To my body,
Firstly I would like to say thank you. For almost 29 years you have housed me and made me able bodied, I have never thought about it before and totally taken you for granted. Secondly I would like to say sorry. I'm sorry for mistreating you and taking you for granted, but also I am sorry for putting you down and thinking horrible things about you.
It has only been the last year that I hav
e truly noticed what you do for me. You created life in my beautiful daughter, you birthed her. And now I have watched her, outside of my body, learn to discover her fingers and toes, crawl, walk and dance. And with every bump or scratch that she has, my heart breaks a little, but I am learning from watching her brush herself off and jump up and carry on. In my head it seems absurd that I am learning something from a 1 year old, but she is teaching me so much.
As a child, you, my body, were right in the middle of 2 sisters very close in age, and although beautiful and slim, you were naturally more chubby than the athletic and lean bodies that held them. Comparison is an evil thing.
As a teenager, you will start becoming interested in fashion, boys and looks. I think this was the time that I started taking your abilities for granted. I did not nourish my body, but instead ate food that I thought was 'cool' and subsequently starved myself afterwards. This was also the time that you first witnessed anorexia, not in yourself, but in those around you. You thought it was the 'done' thing to try as a cool teenager, and I gave it my best swing believe it or not, but THANK YOU for never letting me despite my desire to always be skinnier.
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